Monday, October 6, 2014

Wheel of Balance

Change.

This simple word triggers many far-from-simple feelings inside most of us. There are often so many things we would like to see changed in our lives, (be it psychologically, emotionally, physically…), that it can be overwhelming and confusing to try and focus on any one thing. If our goal is to feel more balanced and at peace in general, where can we get specific in order to begin our personal process of change?

I want to share with you a simple tool that may shed light on why you may be feeling stuck, by exposing where you may be spending a disproportionate amount of your vital energy. This tool is based on what Alfred Adler (one of the head honchos of modern psychology) called the “Life Tasks,” which are basically the main aspects of humanity that, when existing in harmony, create a sense of purpose and meaning in our lives. They include: Work, Love, Social Living, Self, and Spirit.

This may sound simple, or perhaps some of these tenets don’t quite resonate with you, but the point of sharing this idea in this discussion about change is less about the tasks themselves, but more about the balance of things that we value and that cultivate a deep sense of meaning in us. One task is not more important than the others: only when each portion of the wheel is balanced, can it turn smoothly. When we prioritize our life tasks equally, we reap the benefits of feeling in harmony with ourselves.

The way you use this tool is by first acknowledging that you have a finite number of resources. You simply cannot give 110% to all tasks. Conversely, it does not tend to serve us when we use less than we are capable of, as these are the pillars of our sense of purpose, after all.

Next, ask yourself how much vital energy you put into each task. Vital energy is defined by you and will be different for each person (e.g. a religious person may want to pray many times a day to satisfy the spiritual life task, but an atheist may feel that going for a walk in the forest satisfies a spiritual thirst). Now to put pen to paper: take away or add a portion to each individual task in accordance with how much or how little energy you put into each section. For example, if I spend most of my time/energy on work, neglect time for social life and love, and give myself an adequate amount of time for self-care and what I define as spiritual activities, I would add a big chunk onto work, carve out a chunk on both social life and love, and keep the boundary of the circle in tact for self and spirit. Using a pie analogy, this would create a big piece of pie for work... and a very small piece of pie for my social life and love life.

Go ahead and try this without worrying too much about the exact amount of anything. What do you see? What does your “circle” reflect? Where do you spend most of your time and energy? What areas are left neglected? Where are you satisfied in your life? It is natural that this shape cannot roll smoothly, so if your life task wheel is not balanced, it makes a lot of sense why you may be feeling stuck, distraught or exhausted.

This tool is meant to show you visually that it becomes extremely difficult for life to roll smoothly when the core life tasks are out of balance. It is not meant to scare you or scorn you for not having a life partner, the dream job or whatever other societal norms that pressure us all. It simply indicates where in your life could use a little more of your caring attention. Without self-judgment, but with self-compassion, this tool can help you to see that making the changes you want to see in your life can sometimes start with a redirection of your vital energy. Having one area overflowing and the other left nearly empty would make anyone struggle to feel balanced and at peace.

I encourage you to contemplate your wheel and ask yourself how you may take from what is overflowing and channel it into neglected areas in small ways. Courageous small shifts of your attention and energy can help guide you on the path toward the change you want to see in your life.


by Naomi Adams
Graduate Intern


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